:: heart is meant to be broken ::

Remember when they used to say, "Rules are meant to be broken" and so i think that it is better well off to be applied on other things, like; "Heart is meant to be broken".

I tried to search what is the meaning of Love, and how you get to fall so deeply and the next thing you know, everything is over. How can it happen? How can you let another heart been broken?

Seriously, I don't know what to feel anymore. What to believe anymore because all I can feel is pain. The heart is getting colder now and I am not sure if there will be any room left for anyone to enter.

Chill. As that is what exactly my friends will tell me. Chill will make it getting colder? Don't you think so? *smiles*

Just go away everyone, I don't need anyone to come any nearer. Or else, I will scream! *psycho laugh*

Let all the tears running down on my cheek. I know it will make me feel better. There is another box of chocolate, I know I could taste it with Love. Love is just like a box of chocolate. You just eat them all. Ehmm.

Alright then, I guess I just might leave it right here, right now. I know times will heal all wounds. I remember a friend of mine used to tell me that after a breakup. That was ages ago.

Time will heal all wounds, and Heart is meant to be broken! That is my quote for the day!

(",*)

I waited for you today
But You didn't show
No.No.No.

I needed You today
So where did you go?
You told me to call
you said You'd be there
And though I haven't seen You
Are You still there?

Chorus
I cried out with no reply and
I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone.

And though I can not see You
and I can't explain why.
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life oh
We cannot separate
'Cause You're part of me
and though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen

Chorus
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone

We cannot separate

You're part of me
and though You're invisible

I'll trust the unseen

Chorus
I cried out with no reply
and I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone

:: i will give it to the world ::

Having the contemplation that tomorrow is going to be my last day with the agency makes me smile. Finally the day has about to come. I feel sad, of course knowing that I will be leaving all the amazing people in the office. But knowing for the fact that I am leaving for good, nothing else could beat the best feeling I am having now.

I wish to have more times for class now. I can’t let my family down. I am the one and only hope as I have screwed most of the time of my life. I guess, it is time now for me to finally show them that one day, I can take care of the business. I can help in many ways. I can get myself become more stable. Oh how I wonder why towards the end of the year, everyone will seem to be more optimistic towards life? *grins*

Tomorrow I will start packing all my stuff. And I will leave in peace. This doesn’t mean the end.

For every single ending will lead to a new beginning.

So another new beginning to a new journey for me!

New exploration and I can’t wait to lead the world.

If people would ask me what I want out of life, I might not be able to give any of them the right answer. Honestly, I always want to contribute something. Getting myself involved in charity, maybe finding a shelter for those who are in need. That is what I really want to do. I have finally contributed to UNICEF and I am proud and happy. I get a glitz of contentment inside me.

“When you have the money, you have the power”

Now I wonder where all the super rich and famous thrown their money to? Have they invested much on the business? What do they get from there? Can they save the world? Money is only for greed people! And I am greedy enough to get enough for myself so that I can give more to the world.

But as they said, it will never be enough.

I wish to live in a castle in the sky, where everything seems to be happy and everyone seems to have a good life, living in a moderate way, simply average, nothing less and nothing more and none of them will cry in pains. Believe me, the world will be the most beautiful place to live in, next to heaven. But my fantasy world will be too fake to be true. Right? The only reasons why I want to have all the money in the world is because of I want to help those who are in need. Let me have the biggest heart, I guess it gives me more bliss than a sorrow.

So many things can happen in just a twinkle and I am miserable to see the world that is full of tears. Can they feel the pain? Here I am, living a magnificent life and sometimes I do have my hard times and I still complain. What about the other people from the other part of the world? They don’t even have much to eat as they don’t get much to eat, they don’t even have a shelter to stay, and they are in cold, hot, hunger. They never whine. I am healthy, but some are dying. They have disease and I keep on complaining how fat I am.

It is a reality check for me and thank you so much oh Allah for opening my eyes to see the world. It makes me see and wonder if there is only one chance that I can do to help the world, I will start by helping myself becoming more successful so that I can have enough to contribute it to the world.

That is my dream, starting from now on. I want to give enough to the world so that I can save them from hunger. I wish to give more love to the world. I wish to fill this world with happiness. That is my wish.

I will give it to the world.

:: let it rain ::

The rain is falling and I love enjoying the sound of the falling rain. It feels so cold, as cold as my heart and it gives me the fresh aura and it makes me feel better. I remember this pain. I am used to enjoying every part of it.

Gloomy inside, listening to “Ordinary People” by John Legend, the sound of the piano playing over and over again, how lovely. It makes me feel better, listening to the part of the lyric,

“We are just ordinary people, we don’t know which way to go, because we’re ordinary people, maybe we should take it slow.”

I guess everything been said is true. I should just take it slow. I should smile, and enjoy listening to all the beauty in the world.

Let it rain, let it rain,

Let me feel the pain.

:: give me the t.w.i.l.i.g.h.t ::

It’s just fanatical how every girl seem to be so goo-goo gaga over Edward Cullen. A vampire boy who is more than good looking, hot and heart catching. I went to watch the movie with my girlfriends last night. It was a great movie; I can’t even wait for the sequel. Speaking of forbidden love, well, it drives me crazy.

Listening to Iron & Wine song; over, and over again, leave me wonder. Flightless Bird, American Mouth; that is the name of the song. How I wonder if one day, I could find a guy who has everything just like Edward Cullen, the vampire.

I don’t mind revolving myself into one as long as I can be with the one I love, knowing the fact that he will always be there to protect me. *sigh*

Now I feel like crying. How I wonder why, this romantic love story can only happen in a movie? How I wish I can produce my own movie, direct it and be in it. How I wish I could live forever in the fantasy, keep on day dreaming and hoping that one day, the guy of my dream will come into my life and save me from all this tragic melancholy. Let it be Edward Cullen or Robert Pattinson, well, I prefer Edward Cullen still as he is the vampire and Robert Pattinson is just an actor. Being immortal, drown in the sea of love is one of the best idea.

How I wish. Oh stop dreaming. I can’t stop smiling.

I reckoned one of my girlfriends saying, “I don’t mind to be turned into a vampire. I bet if I am in one room with Edward Cullen, I am so going to lose it”.

Indeed all that have been said are true. What is so special about this vampire boy? Oh so I bet every single guy out there will be wondering. From our point of view, I guess they will just never understand. I bet every girl will not mind having a forbidden love with a vampire? Chick flick. Archetypal, now I sound more like a bimbo. *lol*

This is how I see how Edward Cullen can simply catch every woman’s heart. The way he stares, those beautiful eyes (well, even the contact lenses were the one who made his eyes so beautiful), the way he talk, soft spoken, and his charms and the smiles will make everyone drown into him (isn’t all vampires have the potential to do so?). Those pale look of his, being cold and charming. Again and again, it makes me drool. *lol*

He is tall and look at his hair. Now it makes me sound like I am counting every single thing that Edward Cullen has. So perfect! Masculine, when he wears his suits, god knows how good looking he was in those prom suits.

When I watched the scene where he flew from tree to tree and brought Bella together with him, on top of the tree where both of them could see the most beautiful scenery ever. Gosh, now tell me is there any other guy out there who can do exactly like that? I want to have my first date hanging on the tree. No one else, just me and my dream guy, surrounded by the beauty of the nature and I guess that would make the best date ever. Everyone should escape from the real world even for a second. *lol* (my heart is beating fast now).

I bet whoever is reading my blog now will be saying, “Poor thing, just stop dreaming and wake up!”

I don’t mind being single. But it is going to be so sad because my dream guy will never exist. Hence, moving forward Edward Cullen is just a vampire in a movie.

Well, at least having a thought and keep on daydreaming about my so called vampire boyfriend somehow could put a big smile on my face. *blinking my eyes*

I wonder if there is a real vampire out there? I don’t think so.

Stephenie Meyer has written one of the most beautiful stories ever. Twilight indeed is far from perfect; Edward's portrayal as monstrous tragic hero is overly Byronic, and Bella's appeal is based on magic rather than character. Nonetheless, the portrayal of dangerous lovers hits the spot; fans of dark romance will find it is truly hard to resist.

Summit Entertainment has produced the best film of the year. Catherine Hrdwicke has directed the movie perfectly.

Now here goes my final word, on top of everything. I am happy being surrounded by the most wonderful friends of mine. Even deep in my heart, there was a mixture of bitter and sweet, the remedy of a broken heart and I believe it can be healed within times. I know that I am wonderful. Call me hopeless romantic, call me pity, I believe that one day I will find my true love. Be it a forbidden love with a vampire, well I rather be immortal so that I can always live in the dream. Reality bites, yes.

Sappy and clichéd thought of mine.

Please tell me, that there is nothing wrong to dream. Because by dreaming, it will make all the pains go away. True? We should think of happiness instead of sadness. Twilight is what I call as happiness. *smiles*

I guess that’s about it. I will keep on listening to “Flightless Bird, American Mouth” by Iron & Wine. Let’s sing together,

I was a quick wet boy,
diving too deep for coins
All of your street light eyes wide on my plastic toys
Then when the cops closed the fair, I cut my long baby hair
Stole me a dog-eared map and called for you everywhere

Have I found you
Flightless bird, jealous, weeping or lost you,
american mouth
Big pill looming

Now I'm a fat house cat
Nursing my sore blunt tongue
Watching the warm poison rats curl
through the wide fence cracks
Pissing on magazine photos
Those fishing lures thrown in the cold
And clean blood of Christ mountain stream

Have I found you Flightless bird,
grounded, bleeding or lost you,
american mouth
Big pill stuck going down

Chapter #26: My Wish Throughout The Journey

“A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing”.

I received the short message from my mother, wishing me a wonderful life ahead this morning at 0811hrs. How meaningful, it kept on playing on my mind for the whole day. As I turned 26 today, I realized that many things can happen within a day. As much concrete of the reason why, I believe that many things can happen within a year. As I looked back, I reckoned my 25th birthday celebration filled with joy and so much love. It was nothing too luxurious, just a simple get together dinner with my beloved friends at one of our favorite restaurant. That was a year ago. I wonder how far I have gone within a year. To be honest, I totally have no idea. I seem to be lost and I seem could not find any clue if I have ever achieved anything in my life yet. Everything seemed to be trial and error and the rest remain to grow.

The bonding that I have with my family, keeps on getting stronger. The friendship that I treasure with my friends keeps on growing bigger. The career and success that I seek for somehow are giving me a lot of challenges. But I never really want to give up, because I believe this is part of my journey. I have completed 25 chapters in my life and now is only the beginning of another new chapter. Getting older is not a bad thing, I can see that. I realized along the way, I have done a lot of mistake. I have broken people’s heart, I have indeed regretted it. Hence, moving forward I learned from it. I understand now why my mother wants me to see that it is okay to make a mistake in life. It does make sense. Her wisdom words really have motivated me and in a way, it is one of the greatest birthday gifts ever.

“On your birthday,
I wish for you the fulfillment
of all your fondest dreams.
I hope that for every candle
on your cake
you get a wonderful surprise.
I wish for you that
whatever you want most in life,
it comes to you,
just the way you imagined it,
or better.
I hope you get as much pleasure
from our friendship as I do.
I wish we were sisters,
so I could have known you
from the beginning.
I look forward to
enjoying our friendship
for many more of your birthdays.
I'm so glad you were born,
because you brighten my life
and fill it with joy.”

I cried when I read this message. A friend of mine, whom I called my angel, wrote them to me. I realized that I keep on looking for love, when love is actually right there in front of my eyes. How can I not see that it is okay to go solo when I have such a wonderful friend around me? What more would I wish for? Nothing, I guess.

“A birthday note to my dearest friend Aelma...

Dear Aelma,
Today is the day u turn 26,
A day where everything grow a year bigger,

Aelma Safina Zaidi is a woman,
A woman that cares, love and cherish moments of happiness in her life,
she resembles an independent woman,
who survive and succeed what ever comes in front of her,
Life was never easy for her but she made it trough,

Dear Aelma,
you are stubborn in your own cute way,
you are lovely in your own unique way,
you are always blur when jokes are funny,
you give good advice with your sarcasm wisdom,
you look good with your simplest touch of fashion.
and thats the simplest description of you last year:)
the list continues as you grow more _ _ _ _ _(i starts with an O and end with a R)

Dear Aelma,
I wrote a note here today to wish you a fabulousity year ahead,
Your 26, and yes its just a number,
and also a number of years that god blessed you with good life until today,
Babe Aelma,
Happy Joyful Cheerful Blissful Birthday,
and May Allah bless you with good health and life.”

Everything that has been written was right. Life was never easy for me but I made it through. Yes, I am stubborn, and yes I am lovely. I get so blur at times especially when jokes are funny. And yes, people will come to me for my advice and the best I could give would be with my sarcasm wisdom. Sarcasm is part of me, and I believe those who are closed to me will always wish that I could save it away from them. Getting all these sweet wishes on my birthday have really opened up my eyes and heart.

I am glad that I am still alive up until today. It has been 26 years now. And the best way to celebrate today is by thanking Allah for giving me all the opportunities in life to grow and improvise myself. I understand much that there was a happiness and sadness along the way and I believe that is also part of my journey. Today, I would love to wish myself a very Happy 26th Birthday and May this mature age brings me to happiness, love and success that I seek for.

To everyone who have wished me, many thanks to all of you. To my beloved family whom I called my eternal love, I thank all of you for always being there for me, making my day with all the love that you have given me. My sisters, whom I called my true saviors, you girls made me realized that I am worth it. When I get depressed, you never fail to take my hand and hold it tight and make me strong again and help me move forward. My beloved girlfriends, what is friendship without having all of you in it? You ladies never fail to make me smile. All of you ladies never give up on me Each and every single one of you never fails to leave my sight. Through our thick and thin, all of you will always be there to share our joys and laughter, tears and cry, happiness and sadness. Just like the sunshine through the rain, that is how you always brighten up my day.

Here goes my wish for another year of living.

I wish to paint the most beautiful things in life,
I wish to fill this world with colors and love,
I wish to give all the love in the world to everyone who needs it,
I wish to love like I never been hurt,
I wish to succeed in every single chapter of my life,
I wish to treasure the most wonderful things in life,
I wish to end my journey in a good way.

Happy Birthday to me!!
(",*)

:: the so called melancholy ::

23:59 September 9, 2008

At this instantaneous is yet to come another murky day, another discontent chaos. I rather put it this way. As customary, I have no one to converse with on how to articulate my emotions utterly. I see life as astonishing and value it in many ways. Love and friendship and the miraculous of its surprise have fully utilized my brainwave towards life. Therefore happiness will come alongside in the drive of accomplishment one’s destiny. The thrilling ways in finding the answers in the wake of thousand and one questions have always left me bamboozled. Contentment can’t be had unaccompanied as it has to be combined with melancholy. That is how it can be accomplished with an excellent explanation.

As much as I am demanding to stature out the significance behind all the possessions that had happened to me recently, I have tried so hard in dealing with my emotions for wanting to frantically find my bliss. I marvel why god constantly desire us to congregate a few people in our lives in order to find the way on how to be grateful for life and the most important person in our lives. Apart from the wisdom progression of the so called gratitude, we will tend to get slaughter along the way. How to really put everything in words and compose a superior rationalization in how to really convey suchlike implicated and uncountable complexity that necessitate to be heard.

It does give much of bewilderment in order to really seek for the answer. Clueless gives me a lot of nuisance and frustration. The happiness that I have met recently had left me to a total misery. I may not know the gist behind the whole thing that had happened but all I be acquainted with is it has happened for a reason. For what reason is for god to know and for me to find out. As time will rally round me to convene the rationale that I hunt for, at that moment will solitary I may identify why this murky day has arrived and depart me obscure in the sea of perplexity. For now, all I can achieve is presently to sit and get pleasure from the happiness and find the force to triumph over the sorrow.

I can’t question endlessly on why things always happen for reasons because for now I won’t be able to find the answer. Why he never gets to reply me back, I guess time will tell. Sorrow is what I feel deep in my heart. Melancholy is what I called today and for now. Having this astringent melancholy and its demoralizing confusion, how dreadful that can be to someone like me? Getting wedged in between to want to move on and to want to put for a ridiculous hope on somewhat which is hesitant, is it really worth it? A transitory phase of infatuation which he believes as a coping tactic I’m utilizing to get over an issue that is how he called it. I guess he was wrong. And I guess both of them were wrong.

:: s o u l m a t e ::

03:23 September 7 2008

Listening to 'Soulmate' by Natasha Bedingfield on my iTunes leaves me wonder if my so called soulmate does exist. . I wonder if I have found one. They said, it doesn't mean that you will end up marrying your soulmate because they can be anyone. How I wish I could find the answer and most of all, finally to find mine.. Seriously, it leaves me wonder.

There are many things happened in my life lately. Love life makes me drown in the sea of confusion and the incident that happened to me recently was the most piercing one. My life has been so wonderful being with the one and only man i love. Things has been so wonderful and great. Along came aside another person whom I called a GREAT FRIEND. Our friendship started from the World Dj and lead us closed to each other from reading and writing to each other on Facebook.

Have I really found my soulmate?

pi es: I don't know how to put this all in words, but I want u to know that what we had is true and what we had is always been so wonderful. This lyric is specially dedicated to u, CASP :')

Incompatible, it don't matter though

'cos someone's bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do
You're not easy to find

Is it possible Mr. Loveable
Is already in my life?
Right in front of me
Or maybe you're in disguise

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

Here we are again, circles never end
How do I find the perfect fit
There's enough for everyone
But I'm still waiting in line

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

If there's a soulmate for everyone

Most relationships seem so transitory
They're all good but not the permanent one
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told

Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told

Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
If there's a soulmate for everyone

.: My Big Thanks To YESTERDAY :.

As I sat alone in the room, I looked back in the past. The thoughts of what had happened and how it got me here. "This is a new journey, a new path" as I thought to myself.

The feelings gave me the urge of observant and wanting to know where this journey and the new path will lead me to. Another new adventure. Am I ready? Or yet I still want to stay here, sitting alone and thinking. Being in the comfort zone, not willing to take any risk as I am too afraid of the failure. Too afraid to know that I will only get disappointed, furious and frustrated in the end. Snap Aelma, Snap! I may not want to have those negativity thoughts to get over me. Think Aelma, Think! What is so wrong to take a new journey in life? Wake Up Aelma, Wake Up! This is your chance, a new adventurous way to a better new life. I smiled. It feels so good. Why would I want to fear for something better? Don't look back, darling. This is the time. A new beginning :)

Things that happened in the past made me became so weak. Totally weak. I used to feel so lost. For Allah's wills, I got up and I believe I am much a stronger person now. Why would I want to look back in anger? I am more happier than I used to be now. I should thank those people who hurt me in the past, because they are my teacher. They have taught me to become stronger, they have opened up my eyes. Without these people, I won't be able to become of what I am today.

So, as a token of appreciation, I would love to say millions of thanks to all of them people who had hurt me in the past :) Thanks to my yesterday. Now all I want is to appreciate my present in order to live for a better tomorrow.

Thanks for everything O Allah.

My Sunshines,
I could not repay any of you with any diamond rings, nice luxurious vacations or dinner at a fancy restaurants but all I could give is all the love in the world, my blessings and wishing each and everyone of you a beautiful life, wonderful years, success and happiness that will never last. Thanks for being there for me, for making me happy. You are the greatest treasure of all :)

Lastly, Thanks a lot to my YESTERDAY!

** i'm feeling musical and content, happy and in love ;)

:: proud as being one ::

First Circle

Are you religious?
- MashaAllah I am far from that. May
Allah swt gives me taufiq and open up
the door of hidayah for me out of His
Mercy.

Do you believe in an afterlife?
- i believe that the grave is the
first stage to eternity. I believe in
the Resurrection where all hidden
deeds will be made apparent, one will
be accountable of one’s times spent
int his world. I believe in the
everlasting life in Jannah where you
will never die, in there is
everlasting health and you will never
be sick, in there is perpetual youth
and you will never grow old, and in
there is everlasting bliss and you
will never be in want. And I believe
in the fiery punishment in Jahannam,
in there one will be entertained with
fierce blast Fire and boiling water.

Do you criticize other religions?
- if u don’t truly know your own
religion, then speak good and remain
silent.

Do you think that believing in an
ultimate being is dumb?
- look around you, up above and below.
Is not the signs obvious that there is
an Ultimate Being who bring all of
these into existence?

Second Circle

Is your body sacred, or is it a toy?
- it’s one the most sacred thing in a
woman. That is why Islam emphasizes so
much on it.
Women are of two kinds, a flower and a
concealed pearl. Any woman can be a
flower and she may be beautiful, but
she will let herself be picked by
anyone, and passed on to one after
another, after so much sniffing and
touching, her wonderful scents is
lost, her beauty withered and expires,
thus who would want her anymore? but
not many woman is a concealed pearl,
and if she is then she is like a
hidden treasure. Only the deserving
ones the lucky ones who shall discover
her will have the pleasure of her
beauty. And a concealed pearl is a
woman who protects her chastity,
covers herself with modesty, only
reserving herself for one that
deserves her. What an honor for both
of them. And a true dignified woman is
definitely a woman with all these
qualities, the qualities which are
instilled in the wives of The Prophet
(may peace and blessing be upon him),
in Muslim women especially. Not the
bare naked ladies whom are let loose
by their spouses for every stranger on
the street to have lustful gazes on
them. Funny when they said muslim
women should be liberated. Liberated
from what? Pure dignity? Then what,
turn them into a worthless person?
May every woman in this world be
granted the honour of true beauty.

Do you think having sex is something to
be proud of?
- only a beast will be proud of his
carnal desire.

Do you find yourself constantly having
romantic thoughts?
- All Sufis are romantics but not all
romantics are Sufis. It doesn’t answer
the Q but it just popped in my mind. =)

Would you date someone who is sexually
active?
- its not an attractive offer to go
after a man who is vigorously after
his carnal desires.

What is your favorite part of a
romantic
TV show, movie, or book?
- an honest line, gesture that comes
from the heart.

Third Circle

What is something you find yourself
constantly wanting?
- Reason, as the root of my faith.
Knowledge and wisdom as my capital.
Love, as my foundation. Remembrance of
Allah, as my companion.
Firm conviction of Imaan as my power.
Mercy, forgiveness and hope as I am a
hopeless donkey. Sigh I am in so much
wants and needs! And pleasure in my
prayer.

Do you reward yourself?
- I can’t afford to reward myself, but
I am constantly finding means to be
rewarded by One Whom All Rewards came
from.

Do you heal hurt feelings with food?
- can you really eat well when u’re
not feeling well?

Do you overeat?
- that’s what worries me, this donkey
can be a horse sometimes!

Fourth Circle

What is your favorite object?
- My collection of Deeni books

If your house was on fire, would you
save this object?
- Na’udzubillahi mnzalik. With Allah’s
help, yes! What I’d do without my
treasure chest of reminders?!

Would you sell this object if a million
dollars was offered for it?
- I guess so, then I can get more of
them and I could always use extra
money. And spend on something that
will please The Most Giving.

Why is this object important to you?
- it has served and will continue to
serve me with abundance of knowledge
and wisdom. InshaAllah.

Fifth Circle

If someone talked smack about you, what
would you do?
- I’d make dua that Allah have mercy
on them and forgives them for what
they not know of.

Do you fight with words or punches?
- can I choose not to fight?
Definitely not physical assault.

Do you find yourself saying mean things
to people over the internet (which is
being a pussy, I'll have you know) that
you wouldn't say in real life?
- just don’t treat others the way u
would not like to be treated.

If someone dissed something you worked
hard on, what would you do?
- what is there to do? If it’s a
constructive criticism I’d gladly
appreciate and be thankful on their
valuable attention on it. If its just
to diss only God knows for what
reason, then would it matter to me?
It’s not their attention that I value.

Forgive and forget, or forget to
forgive?
- yeah agree, forgetting aint easy.
Forgive for the sake of Allah, Forget
for the sake of Allah. inshaAllah
things will be a lott more easier =)

Sixth Circle

What illegal or sacrilegious activites
do you practice?
- istighfar bnyk2 eh.

Are you rebellious against your
religions' teachings?
- O Allah, help me hold firmly my Iman
and Islam. Ameen.

Have you ever felt the desire to
practice witch craft?
- alhamdulillah there’s never such
vicious desire.

Seventh Circle

Do you have violent thoughts about the
person you hate?
- Life is so short there isn’t enough
time to love. Where do ppl find time
to hate??

Have you ever wanted to kill someone?
- Has humanity becomes so malicious
towards one another that this Q is
becoming popular??

Who was the last person you hit?
- a makcik in a kancil =S that thing u
drive is a destructive weapon you’re
carrying, so don’t let yrself be in
total heedlessness when u’re driving
it!

What weapon would you want if you
entered a Battle Royale situation
(basically, where you hafta kill your
classmates and friends)?
- Gory! No! can we not behead anyone
especially classmates and friends?!!

Have you ever wanted to take a martial
arts class?
- yes, at one point Ilyas talked me
into taking aikido. Lol.

Eighth Circle

Do you do things you know are bad?
- I’m a weak helpless donkey. I cant
bring myself fight the beast =(

Would you work for a corrupt
association that paid you big bucks?
- I don’t wanna go anywhere near
corruption. This world is so full of
it. To find one honest fella is
difficult at this day and age. Are we
not worried of what we are becoming?

Ninth Circle

Would you rather be a traitor against
your friends or family?
- this Q is not getting anywhere good

When is it an alright time to betray
your loved ones?
- and it’s getting impossible. I’d be
surprised if anyone would suggest its
alright.

How do you feel when someone betrays
you?
- im tired. Lets just end It here.
Justification do no justice sometimes.

***

As I stumbled upon the bulletin that has been posted by my sister Weckie, I smiled. The thought of having such a wonderful sister like her really make me proud. I noticed that most people will tend to post a lot of surveys on the Friendster Bulletin Board sharing their thoughts about mostly every single thing in life (including me). People like me, we take it as something fun to do which is sometimes we do forget that we should share more on things like this.

Something that could help to build up oneself to become a better person. Something that could make you think that actually life is too short to be wasted on other things. As we live only for a while and one day, we will leave this world. As for me on the other hand, I am way much different from my sister. She has changed for the past one year plus and here I am, I have changed slowly and yet I am still me.

Reading her blog has really made my day. At least something that could motivate me and I really appreciate that. I am thankful as she has made me remember that no matter how successful and happy one can be, no matter how wealthy and powerful one can be, no matter how u belong to your beloved ones, we as a human who has bow to our first responsibility as the khalifah in this world, no matter how far we could go in life, we will one day return to our owner. The one and only The Almighty Allah. Because, we belong to The Almighty.

May Allah swt gives me taufiq and open up the door of hidayah for me out of His Mercy.

Ameen.